The Ninth Night of the Month

When the night came, the king sat private in his chamber and sending after the Wazir, sought of him the story; and he said “Hear, O august king,

The Tale of the Simpleton Husband [FN#371]

There was once in olden time a foolish man and an ignorant, who had abounding wealth, and his wife was a beautiful woman, who loved a handsome youth. The Cicisbeo used to watch for her husband’s absence and come to her, and on this wise he abode a long while. One day of the days, as the woman was closeted with her lover, he said to her, “O my lady and my beloved, an thou desire me and love me, give me possession of thy person and, satisfy my need in the presence of thy husband; otherwise I will never again come to thee nor draw near thee while I live my life.” Now she loved him with exceeding love and could not suffer his separation an hour nor could endure to anger him; so, when she heard his words, she said to him, “Bismillah, so be it, in Allah’s name, O my darling and coolth of mine eyes: may he not live who would vex thee!” Quoth he, “To day?” and quoth she, “Yes, by thy life,” and made an appointment with him for this. When her husband came home, she said to him, “I want to go a pleasuring,” and he said, “With all my heart.” So he went, till he came to a goodly place, abounding in vines and water, whither he carried her and pitched her a tent by the side of a tall tree; and she betook herself to a place alongside the tent and made her there a Sardáb, in which she hid her lover. Then said she to her husband, “I want to climb this tree;”[FN#372] and he said, “Do so.” So she clomb it and when she came to the tree top, she cried out and slapped her face, saying, “O thou lecher, are these thy lewd ways? Thou swarest faith to me, and thou liedest.” And she repeated her speech twice and thrice. Then she came down from the tree and rent her raiment and said, “O lecher, an these be thy dealings with me before my eyes, how dost thou when thou art absent from me?” Quoth he, “What aileth thee?” and quoth she, “I saw thee futter the woman before my very eyes.” Cried he, “Not so, by Allah! But hold thy peace till I go up and see.” So he clomb the tree and no sooner did he begin to do so than out came the lover from his hiding place and taking the woman by the legs, fell to shagging her. When the husband came to the top of the tree, he looked and beheld a man futtering his wife; so he called out, “O whore, what doings are these?” and he made haste to come down from the tree to the ground. But meanwhile the lover had returned to his hiding place and his wife asked him, “What sawest thou?” and he answered, “I saw a man shag thee;” but she said, “Thou liest; thou sawest naught and sayst this only by way of phantasy.” The same they did three several times, and every time he clomb the tree the lover came up out of the underground place and mounted her, whilst her husband looked on and she still said, “Seest thou aught, O liar?” “Yes,” would he answer, and came down in haste, but saw no one and she said to him, “By my life, look and speak naught but sooth!” Then he cried to her, “Arise, let us depart this place, for ’tis full of Jinn and Marids.”[FN#373] Accordingly, they returned to their house and nighted there, and the man arose in the morning, assured that this was all but phantasy and fascination. And so the lover won his wicked will. “Nor, O king of the age,” continued the Wazir, “is this stranger than the story of the King and the Tither.” When the king heard this from the Minister, he bade him go away, and he went.